Dangerous Chivalry

obamicon
Originally uploaded by Alta Marie

Drake is a chivalrous sort. I am universally suspicious and defensive. It makes for a strange dance.

Most of the time his chivalry is wonderful and appreciated. He always brings the groceries up and gets things from up high above our cupboards. He takes out the Kitchenaid, and moves the fridge to retrieve the top of our pepper grinder. Holds doors, makes me walk on the inside of the sidewalk (away from traffic) all of that. Then there are the dangerous acts of chivalry. These days they mainly involve the use of revolving doors.

I say "these days" because there were dangerous times back in the beginning before I knew what to expect, while we were adjusting to one another. Sometimes he would almost knock me over to get the door, or to move me into position on the sidewalk. Now my main issue is with the revolving exit doors on the subway. You know the ones I'm talking about, right? Not the turnstiles, but the ones that are tall and (if you're imaginative) look like vicious teeth.

I require no assistance here. I don't need to go first, it just confuses people behind us. Also, though sometimes it is nice not to have to push on the teeth--(I will admit then when I'm traveling without him these days I notice how heavy those things are when someone's not pushing behind you) sometimes it feels like I'm in a very short race with death. You know how the revolving-teeth-doors are designed to not let people get in, only out? Well what if, with Drake pushing behind me, I miss my chance to exit and get crushed between the bars???? Don't tell me that you've never thought of this as a potential horrible obituary. I can't be the only one that does this.

I write my own obituary at least 3 times a week. It's always sudden an unexpected and I am ALWAYS on the lookout for my sudden death. Remember the rubber band I mentioned yesterday? That could've done it too. What if the toe of my shoe got stuck and I tripped and fell on my face into the street and a cab ran me over....
"Heart shaped rubber band ends life of young temp/singer/photographer/doctor."

So all of this is to say, Drake-- lately you've been pushing the teeth-of-death-doors just slightly too fast for me, and today I'm wearing heels, so please don't crush me against the bars when we go home today, OK? I'm sure that you would stop pushing before it came to that, but better safe than sorry. Also, when you pried the closing subway car doors off of that lady's purse yesterday, you were a hero (although if your arm got caught in the door and the train departed I would have hated to have written your premature obituary....)

By the way, isn't the pic awesome? click here to make one yourself. Make sure that you use a .gif file. They turn out way better that way... if you use a .jpg it ends up pixelated.

So Drake and I commute together, and I think it makes us look like tourists.

Starry starry night
Originally uploaded by Alta Marie

First of all, anyone who shows any interest in anything is probably a tourist, or at the very least not a native. Living here, my walking/commute pattern is very consistent. I take the L to the ACE to Canal street, walk down the same street into my building every day.

If the Chinese man with the newspapers is outside the door of the SoHo pharmacy when I emerge from the subway station, then I am on time. If the gates are up and he's already inside, then I am late. If the man in the Giants puffy coat is handing out menus before you cross Greenwich Street to enter the building, no one takes them. If girls in hot pants are handing them out, some people do take them. (I bring my lunch to work, not to mention I find hot pants inappropriate before noon on workdays.)

So now that Drake and I commute to work together, everything is all off and I'm quite sure that we look like tourists. People don't hold hands or link arms on the way to work... Every time the subway announcer says "Stand clear of the closing doors, please" he jerks me away from the direction of the door and holds me away from them (even when we are seated and/or no where near the doors.)

Also on the first day I darted ahead of him in the crowd and ended up significantly ahead, so every now and then we race and sometimes we also hide from each other (behind trucks or cars or other people) while the other one pretends not to care and then sneak back up again and then mention what a better spy/secret agent one of us would be than the other.

Our chances of looking like natives are totally ruined...

Things that have threatened to ruin my day so far.

In Central Park
Originally uploaded by Alta Marie

Not this picture which I love.

1. The woman wearing toe shoes. by this I do not mean like a ballerina, I mean shoes where the toes are separate. Like toe socks but with shoes. They were black and flourescent green. It is 20 degrees outside. Maybe they're warm, but they made her look like a lizard and it upset me more than footwear ever has before.

2. The fact that in the Spanish version of their subway ad, Trolman and Glasner Law Firm uses the phone number 1-888-MARGARITA.

3. The woman sitting next to me pulled back her fur hood and it turned out that the hood was not furry, that was just her hair.

4. There was a rubber band in the shape of a heart on the sidewalk.
(I don't know why this ruined my day. I think I was just being dramatic at that point.)

Brainstorming

So is "Texification" now entirely irrelevant as a blog name? I think it may just be. If I were to rename this blog, what would it be? It's not entirely about crafting or singing or photography or baking or prank-playing or city living or travel or teaching.
Would love to hear any suggestions in the comments

New Year's Baby

New Year's Baby
Originally uploaded by Alta Marie

She wasn't born on New Year's, nor was this photo taken on New Year's-- she's just so darn cute and I needed a theme picture.

SO what of the New Year's Resolve? I've never written down resolutions. They seemed doomed don't they? But for what it's worth, here's one.

This year I'm going to pursue work that interests me.

I'm not going to pursue a "career at the highest level." (I've used that before) and I'm not going to specifically pursue photography or singing. I'm going to take it on a case by case basis and I'm going to take on projects that interest me.

And that's all she wrote.

I think I'll drink more water too.

Who who.... who who....

IMG_3436
Originally uploaded by Alta Marie

Who are you? yes you... reading this. I was near convinced that I sent these words out into the air for an average of 3.5 people to read. Then I installed a tracker and found that in the past 3 days I have had 26 "unique" visitors.

I like this for many reasons--
1. you are "unique." Isn't that nice?
2. apparently some of you live in Canada and Sweden
3. it's always nice not to talk to yourself....

And this leads me to questions--
1. Who are you?
2. Can we be friends? or are we already....
3. Is it creepy or cool that I can track you (I'm watching your every move from Google Earth.... ;)
4. Don't you think that I look like Little Bo Peep in that costume?

Cheese is coming back in style

I forgot to post this from last winter....
Happy New Year! God Bless America

“Ya know what’s making a come back again? Cheese.”

Why didn’t I sit next to the man who said that? Then again, I couldn’t possibly have known that he would be the most interesting person at the airport. Nothing about his oversized trenchcoat, turtleneck and tennis shoes could’ve broadcast that. I could’ve maybe made a move after I overheard the conversation with his family. The end that I could hear started something like this:

“Hey honey, it’s daddy. How are you doing sweetheart….. what? Well how am I supposed to know? you talk like a girl so what do you want from me? WHAT? That is not funny, I TOLD you to stay away from my Firebird. Not a finger!”

The girl that was sitting next to this man had no time for him whatsoever. I think it’s safe to say that she didn’t realize what she had. I didn’t get the chance to know her as well as I got to know Vin from my eavesdropping. She was a tougher nut to crack. Pink track suit, flip flops. cell phone. Ipod. She did not want to talk to him, but he was persistant. She would fake a laugh and put in her earphones, first one then both. Eventually she stopped taking them out when he came up with a new topic of conversation.

That’s the line that did him in.

“Ya know what’s making a comeback again? Cheese.” I spit a little bit of Diet Coke from across the way, but no one noticed. That’s another reason I love New York. No one notices anything. That’s the shame of it too. Vin came up with the best intro line I’ve ever heard and that girl simply did not care. I watched from across the way as she added the extra protective layer of zipping up the hoodie, putting her knees up on the chair—trying to squeeze herself into invisibility. This did not work either. It sounded to me like he had teenagers, he was probably used to people ignoring him.

Curious to know about how cheese managed to bounce back again, I started trying to physically impose myself into the conversation from across the aisle. “Please don’t stop talking” I telepathically broadcasted “please please pick up and run with the cheese thing.” He did. I’m that good. He went on to tell this girl that every 10 years or so wine and cheese makes a comeback in the US (not internationally of course, where it has worked it’s wiley way into the lifestyle.) Every 10 years or so restaurants start to bring it back and it gets really popular. It happened in the 80’s and the 90’s and now it’s happening again. What heralded this comeback? I would’ve asked. What shot cheese from obscurity back into the public eye again in 2008? She started singing quietly along with her ipod. A perfect waste.

I kept wanting to catch his eye, but he never looked my way. Maybe it’s for the best. I can’t imagine what we would’ve talked about all the way to Florida—I can’t imagine it getting any better than that, but it could’ve. There is a world of potential in airports and other waiting rooms that is lost. That’s why I don’t listen to my ipod in public places. Sometimes if I’m uncomfortable I’ll put the headphones in and pretend to be listening. That leaves me fin rather the best position when I’m in a situation that is funny without my involvement. If I don’t need to meddle at all, that’s the best way really, because then it doesn’t seem like I’m gawking or taking notes. Not that anyone would notice if I did. I love New York.